Providing mental health and emotional support

Understandably the dying person may be mentally and emotionally distressed especially when they are cognitively alert near the end of life. 

They may also have very specific fears and concerns, for example, worrying about being alone at the end or a fear of the unknown and leaving their loved ones behind. This fear can be made worse when family and friends do not know how to help or what to say and may even stop visiting adding to the person’s sense of isolation. Sometimes doctors feel a sense of helplessness as they cannot cure the person and can seem to avoid the dying person. 

1. If the person is highly anxious and depressed it is important to treat the emotional pain and suffering. Talk to their doctor about what can be offered. You might want to contact a counsellor, ideally one familiar with end-of-life issues. If the depression or anxiety is severe, medicine may help.
2. Don’t forget that the simple act of physical contact—holding hands, a touch, or a gentle massage—can make a person feel connected to those they love. It can be very soothing. 
3. Create a comforting environment that is right for that person. If the person is very sociable then having lots of family and friends around them will be important when they are dying. If they like peace and quiet then having just one or two people with them is more appropriate. If the person loves music then music at a low volume and soft lighting might be very soothing to them. 
4. Just being with the person is often enough. It is not necessary to fill the time with talking – a quiet presence may be all that is needed.