When it’s time to ask for help

One of the biggest challenges of being a carer for someone with a terminal illness is knowing when to ask for help. There may be certain crossroads in your caring journey when you will ask yourself different questions about when is the right time to ask for help and where to go for it:

If it is a medical emergency then call 999. This can include loss of consciousness, an acute confused state, fits that aren’t stopping, chest pain, breathing difficulties, severe bleeding that won’t stop, and severe allergic reaction.

Call 999 immediately if you think the person is having a heart attack or stroke as every second counts. If not a medical emergency and it is health surgery hours you should contact the person’s GP. If the person’s GP surgery is not open then ring 111 for out of hours health advice. You can also use the NHS 111 online. 

In this situation, you can call the Emergency Duty Team (EDT) requesting help and support or an urgent assessment. It is an emergency social work service designed only for urgent situations which arise out of normal office hours and which cannot be left with an appropriate degree of safety until the next normal working day. It is worth noting that there are usually only 2-4 members of staff on duty and only 1 member of staff from 1 am to 9 am, so calls will be prioritised depending on the level of risk. Tel: 01483 517898 or email: edt.ssd@surreycc.gov.uk

You may not want to call a hospice until the final days and weeks of caring for your loved one, however, your local hospice can help you much earlier on by providing additional specialised nursing care, medications, medical equipment, and supplies in the person’s own home that might help you. They can help improve the person’s quality of life by managing pain and the symptoms of their illness, but they can also give you emotional support and guidance. So if you haven’t already been put in touch with your local hospice by the person’s GP or district nurse think about making early contact.  

If you are seeking urgent mental health support during evenings and weekends and you don’t know where to go you may be tempted to go to your local A & E but this isn’t always the best place as it is busy and isn’t staffed by mental health professionals. So the NHS and the local voluntary sector in Surrey have teamed up to create 6 Safe Havens which are specifically designed to support those in mental distress.

These havens are staffed by mental health professionals and peer support workers and are able to address your symptoms or those of your loved one in a timely way and offer information and advice so you can both stay well at home. Safe Havens can support you as a carer to feel less isolated and give you a place to come where you will be understood and know what you are going through.